One of our Facebook followers has recently reached out to me with her story. I asked for permission to publish it on the blog and she agreed. Without further ado:
“I wanted to hear your thoughts on how to handle a certain issue with American Airlines. We are AAdvantage members and fly AA, a lot! My flight this morning from LGA to MCO was the second time AA separated my family on a domestic flight, sitting my toddler son by himself. The first time it happened my husband, son and I were flying from LAX to LGA. And we were in three separate rows, and two separate aisles. AA fixed the issue quickly once we brought it to their attention.
This time, my son and I were traveling together on a 6am flight. When we bought the tickets, we requested seats together, and put that my son was only three years old. Not to mention, his boarding pass said he was a child. Still I was seated across the aisle from him when I went to check in!
I asked AA staff at the airport three times to help: first when I was checking in my bags, a second time at the gate, and a third time while boarding the plane. AA staff responded by telling me I had to ask other travelers to switch seats! I tried to stay calm because my son was fast asleep and I was by myself trying to juggle bags, a stroller, and sleeping toddler.
But AA’s refusal to accommodate me left me with the responsibility to beg strangers to switch their seats with me. I was especially shocked that in the process of trying to get someone to switch seats, a flight attendant told me to sit separately from my son because I was disturbing the boarding process.
Without any help from AA staff, and with only a few minutes before the doors closed, a couple offered to change seats so my son could sit next to me. I was so shocked that AA staff refused to help that I couldn’t even relax on the flight. Once we got to our hotel and got settled, I called AA to complain and I was told that: 1) It was my fault for booking a flight through a discount website, 2) FAA and DOT regulations allows them to seat us the way they did and 3) The issue is not AA’s fault but the fault of staff at LGA (who btw happen to work for AA).
That makes no sense whatsoever. The whole thing seems like a massive safety issue, and to me defies logic. But I welcome your thoughts, and whether you think I should escalate this up the chain at AA. I wonder also how many other families have had this happen to them.”
This sort of thing really makes my blood boil.
Surely, most of the AA workers have children themselves, and therefore would understand the precarious position this mother was in. Nobody would think that it’s OK to put a toddler away from the parent on a public bus, so how is airplane different?
Frankly, I would not want my 10-year-old daughter to sit separately from me, especially if there was a man next to her. Considering all the perverted stuff you hear on the news, can you really blame me?
Last year Nancy wrote a post on experiencing a similar issue so this problem appears to be quite common. She mentioned that Congress passed a law that requires airlines to sit families with kids ages 13 and under together without having to pay for it.
H.R. 636—FAA Extension, Safety and Security Act of 2016 became law on July 15, 2016. Section 2309 Family Seating states:
(a) In General.–Not later than 1 year after the date of enactment
of this Act, the Secretary of Transportation shall review and, if
appropriate, establish a policy directing all air carriers providing
scheduled passenger interstate or intrastate air transportation to
establish policies that enable a child, who is age 13 or under on the
date an applicable flight is scheduled to occur, to be seated in a seat
adjacent to the seat of an accompanying family member over the age of
13, to the maximum extent practicable and at no additional cost, except
when assignment to an adjacent seat would require an upgrade to another
cabin class or a seat with extra legroom or seat pitch for which additional payment is normally required.
You can read the entire text here.
The Secretary of Transportation had until July of 2017 to establish a policy for the airlines, but it looks like it never materialized.
What you can do in order to avoid this sort of thing from happening to your family
1) When flying with young kids, get your seat assignments as soon as you book the tickets. Check on them periodically in order to catch any changes.
2) If you see that the seats were reassigned without your permission, call the airline and demand (politely) that your kids are seated next to you. HUCA (hang up call again) and ask for a supervisor if you have to.
3) Print the page outlining the law mentioned above and carry it with you to the airport. Be polite yet firm, and try to get the seat assignments taken care of before you go through security.
4) If everything fails, ask fellow passengers to switch seats with you. While most people will ignore your pleas, there will probably be a few kind souls who will understand your predicament.
5) Reach out to airlines and demand that they establish a firm family seating policy, so parents don’t have to beg to sit next to their kids. My blog is fairly small, but I plan to tweet this post to American Airlines. The more noise families make, the more likely we are to be taken seriously. Pass this on if you agree.
Update: the reader has forwarded me the email from American Airlines as well her response.
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Hello (name removed) |
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Thank you for contacting American Airlines. As a traveling mother myself to a toddler, I understand that it is very important for parents and their children to be seated together and not across the aisle from one another. I sincerely regret the concerns and frustration you and Ronin experienced, as a result of the two of you not being able to obtain reserved seating on the same side of the aisle. After further review of this matter, our records indicate that you purchased your tickets through a third party travel agency and at the time of your seat request, all adjacent seating was either reserved by other customers, “blocked” to allow our airport personnel to handle unexpected seating issues that may arise on the day of departure, or they are part of our Main Cabin Extra or Preferred Seats travel options. We have internal processes in place, both in the days leading up to the departure date as well as at the airport, to assist families in obtaining seating together. Many of these families will check in and find that they have already been assigned seating together. For those who have not yet received seating together, our airport agents are able to assist families in obtaining appropriate seating. In any case, we make every effort to ensure that families traveling with children are seated together at boarding time. Per your correspondence and our records, you and your son were placed in the only available adjacent seats together. While I do understand your concerns, adjacent aisle seating is considered continuous seats. Thank you for taking the time to share you travel experience with us and provide us with valuable feedback to promote and drive change for traveling families. We do appreciate your business and thank you for contacting American Airlines Customer Relations. |
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Reader’s response to American Airlines:
Author: Leana
Leana is the founder of Miles For Family. She enjoys beach vacations and visiting her family in Europe. Originally from Belarus, Leana resides in central Florida with her husband and two children.
I suggest all one needs to do to avoid the problem on any airline is buy your ticket thru the airline itself, not on points or a third party and go ahead a select your seats ASAP. I’ve seen numerous post/problems others have had while using points and third party outlets. Weird routes, missed connections, seating issues…the list is long. We’ve only missed a couple of flights in 25 years of flying (domestic and international) and those have been because of weather.
Plus, it helps to arrive more than an hour before take off. Arriving thirty minutes before boarding doesn’t give oneself, the gate agents or the crew much time to rearrange seating. Kinda leaves one winded and testy (been there, done that) after lugging bags, sleeping three year old and stroller thru the airport (but one would surely have the child in the stroller and at least one carry-on stashed below the stroller and another on the handles with perhaps a backpack slung over the shouders to ease the burden. That’s how not-quite-three-year-old Nemo travelled from DFW to LHR.)
And, yes, my kiddos have been separated from me while flying. They were nine and eleven and the flight attendants were wonderful! The children were well behaved. The younger two sat with me. Once, a three year old had to sit behind me because we rushed on the plane and took the last two seats .After take off he sat on my lap. He stayed there after that because he fell asleep.
We don’t presume or assume. Treat all with respect and kindness. Nemo’s first flight in July to LHR he gave out candy to those around him just in case and goodies to the flight attendants. Tis learning do unto others, no matter the outcome.
I also think that the employees’ behaviour is dictated by the company rules, and they do not have the freedom to operate in what we would consider a decent and reasonable way towards customers. Apart from the usual ‘Have a nice day’ banter, their hands are tied. We heard one of them being intimidated loudly by her boss as we stood at the desk.
@Chris H Toxic company culture at AA has a bearing on it, for sure!
I agree with you that Ryanair is preferable to AA.
We are a retired couple and yesterday flew from Dallas to Manchester via Philadelphia. Our tickets showed us seated apart on both flights, so we asked at check-in to be seated together but were told to ask at the gate. We did so but our request was refused “because the flight is full” (overbooked actually). We were 3 seats apart on the same row, but it was obvious that passengers on either side of us were travelling alone, but being British we were reluctant to start asking people to swop. In Philadelphia we again asked to be seated together for the transatlantic overnight flight, but were again refused and given the same reason. I was accused of being unreasonable for challenging that ‘logic’.
We boarded and again found ourselves on the same row, but 5 seats apart, This time a kind young man offered to swop places, so we travelled together, but no thanks to AA.
We were wondering why AA did not behave like most European airlines and seat us together, until an English couple returning from a Caribbean cruise told us they had to pay $70 each to be seated together, So the fact that we had been separated on both flights seems to indicate a deliberate policy designed to maximise revenue. We expect that AA have a big (and expensive) legal team to keep them from being challenged, with staff trained along the following lines:
1. Randomise seating for couples and families, so they will always feel forced to pay for the privilege of sitting together. (But don’t put them too far apart because they will be walking up and down the aisles to speak to each other and this will interfere with trollies.)
2. To mask the randomisation policy, be ready with plausible reasons for separating families, such as ‘You booked through an agent’, or ‘The flight is full so there are no spare seats’ or ‘It is not possible to guarantee seating’ etc.
3. Overbook flights but offer ‘compensation’ for passengers willing to stand down, being careful to keep the compensation cost lower than the ticket price.
We have flown a lot, but AA are amongst the poorest airlines for customer service and one of the least friendly we have experienced, putting their dollars and cents above all other considerations. They may be the biggest, but we rank them with the worst, along with Turkish Airlines, Ryanair, and Norwegian Airlines. Their senior policymakers could of course try to learn from those with clearly better reputations, e.g. Lufthansa, but we don’t expect their arrogance and greed would allow it.
@Chris H Thanks for your comment. Everything you said is spot on and mirrors my own experience. American Airlines is terrible when it comes to customer service. Obviously, not all employees are bad but in general, most just don’t seem to care.
Unfortunately, my travel choices are often dictated by award availability, so we continue to fly AA. But it’s not my preferred carrier, that’s for sure. It’s funny, I’ve actually had good experience with Ryanair, but maybe we were just lucky.
Was the reader and child across aisle from each other? Like able to hold hands? Or far away from each other?
First of all, I would tell American that if they don’t want us buying tickets from crappy discount sellers they shouldn’t seem them there!
I would have asked flight attendants for their first and last names so that I could include in my report to their superiors. put my complaint in writing. In my report I would including the quoted law, flight number, etc, and mail it certified. I’d request a written response.
This has happened to me many times when traveling on miles – being separated from son but always to be reseated together. I find preemptive action is best. I call the airline to make a note that my son is “only 9” and can’t sit alone, that we *can’t* be separated. Most airlines will then tie our reservations together so that we can’t be separated. Then I call any other partner airlines under the same reservation and do the same. We haven’t been separated since I’ve started doing this.
Good luck!
@Talchinsky I’m not sure on the specifics of the seating arrangement, but it was clear that this mom wanted to be right next to her kid. I certainly can relate to that! I would feel the same way.
I agree that it’s crazy that AA employees had an issue with her buying tickets via third-party website. Why would any of that matter? Children belong with their parents when it comes to public transportation, no “ifs” or “buts” about it.
I absolutely agree that being proactive helps. Unfortunately, not every parent has the time to “babysit” reservations. Some show up at the airport only to discover this nonsense and don’t have the energy to argue when there is a line of people behind them.
This is absolutely ridiculous! How in the world is a stranger going to comfort a toddler? It should be illegal for airlines to separate families. I have one that’s afraid of flying and another with serious ear pressure problems that if they’re not taken care of properly ends up with her crying the entire time during landing. AA separated my family once and were unwilling to help me. They changed the airplane the day before our flight. I noticed it when I did the online check in, and I called AA right away and they told me to take it up with the boarding staff (who didn’t care either). I booked the flight 7 months in advance and directly with AA and still was treated badly. Some kind lady switched with my husband when she noticed that we were separated. I was so furious that they could do this and they had no sympathy whatsoever.
I have 4 flights coming up soon with AA, and they better not pull this same garbage again.
@Stephanie I totally agree that this should be illegal. I honestly don’t understand how airlines can keep getting away with it without implementing a clear policy. This new law doesn’t seem to make any difference, and most airline employees don’t even know it exists.
This is “common sense” stuff, for goodness sake. I realize that some couples may not want to be separated in order to accommodate families, but it should be mandatory. Just ask for volunteers and pick a random number in case nobody is willing to switch (just like they do in event of overbooking). Case closed.
I have actually stood at the front of the plane and begged to have someone move so my 5 year old wouldn’t sit by strangers. Finally a priest offered to move but it is ridiculous that the attendants were of no help and that people just seem to forget what it’s like having children. There is NO WAY I would feel comfortable allowing even my 10 year old to sit without someone he knew. Oh, it was a SW flight where the first flight arrived late so we had to run to our connection and missed family boarding because of the airline.
That’s just awful. We are flying SW next week for the first time and I wasn’t too worried because of family boarding, but I never thought about the late connection issue. Now, I’m a little worried. One of my kids is a very nervous flyer and gets upset during turbulence. I need to sit next to him to comfort him. I can’t imagine being separated, especially in the event of a true emergency.
@Jennifer In all likelihood you will be OK, so don’t stress too much. Do print out that law I’ve mentioned, as it may help in case things go south.
@Jessie I’m very sorry this happened to you! Southwest flight attendants absolutely dropped the ball on this one. I don’t know how long ago this happened, but I would email a complaint to Southwest. You may at least get some points out of it, as you should.
That is ridiculous! Who wants to sit next to a stranger’s toddler, anyway? In an emergency situation, that is just the worst. In a regular flight situation, also not good.
I had no idea this was law now. Seems the airlines don’t, either.
@Kacie That’s exactly what I was thinking! Why would anyone voluntarily sit next to someone else’s kid? It looks like the law is not enforced, unfortunately.
We recently flew Southwest, which is all open seating. Families with children under 6 years old are allowed on early so that they can secure seats together. But I wouldn’t want a 7-year-old sitting alone on a flight, so the 6 year cutoff doesn’t seem ideal. I don’t care for open seating at all.
Not seating a toddler next to his mother is really odd and puts them in a bad spot. No one wants to bargain with their neighbors for a seat swap.
Although you quoted the wording directly in the Southwest policy, I’ve found that MOST Southwest gate agents have no problem allowing family boarding with children up to 10 years of age.
I am actually a huge fan of open seating on Southwest. I fly with three toddlers and enjoy being able to board early. In addition, the process seems to run much more quickly and efficiently than with the big legacy airlines. In addition, the flight attendants are very kind to the children and make them feel special. Only JetBlue flight attendants have displayed the same level of kindness and accommodation in my experience.
@Amy and @Jared Southwest is an interesting case. The open seating policy scares many families, for sure. I do agree with Jared that Southwest in general is very family-friendly. In an unlikely case that you can’t find a seat next to your child, I imagine a flight attendant would help out and ask passengers to switch seats. Every single flight attendant on Southwest that I came across has been over-the-top friendly.
Another solution is to buy “Early bird” check-in for an extra $15 or so. That would assure that you get on the plane when there are plenty of seats available.
I do wish all airlines would establish some sort of policy that would not put parents in this position. Paying “early bird” fee for 4-6 people will definitely put a dent in your pocket.