I’m breaking my cardinal rule of family travel: We invited one of my son’s friends go to Japan with us next year. I’ve always been against inviting our kids’ friends with us on our trips (see this post from 2018!). Traveling as a family of five already has its logistical challenges. Why add to the mix?
But, things have changed. Two years ago, our niece came with us to France and Switzerland. And earlier this year, we traveled with another family in Portugal. Both of those experiences were positive.
Maybe it’s because I’m getting older and my kids aren’t quite the handful they used to be. But my new philosophy is “the more, the merrier”, especially if we have miles and points to spare.
I was talking to my college son about possibly inviting someone (most likely a relative) to join us on our trip to Japan next summer. He immediately suggested one of his college friends who is a Linguistics major that has expressed a desire to visit Japan.
My husband and I thought about it for a few days. Our main hesitation was that this would be opening the door for our other kids to invite friends on future trips. But in the end, we decided to say yes.
Finding Flights on Miles
I had booked my family’s award flights to Japan a few months ago and was able to get us all in Premium Economy seats (plus my oldest in Business Class one way). Unfortunately, award availability in premium seats has dried up. I couldn’t even find regular economy award flights on the nonstop flights from DFW to Tokyo.
But the good news is that my son and his friend will both be 20 years old by the time we travel, and they can handle the journey to and from Japan on their own. The best I could find is two economy flights from San Francisco to Haneda airport for both ways.
Old flight: Previously, my son was booked on JAL from DFW to Tokyo in Business class for 92,750 British Airways Avios + $264.20. His return flight was from HND to Chicago ORD on JAL in Premium Economy using Alaska miles for 50,000 miles + $54.80 in taxes. Total: 142,750 miles + $319 in taxes.
I canceled both of his flights and got back all of the miles and $256.50 in the fees and taxes ($50 cancellation fee from British Airways and $12.50 nonrefundable partner award booking fee from Alaska).
New Flights: Two seats from SFO to HND on JAL using BA Avios cost a total of 51,500 Avios + $464.40 in taxes. For the way back, I booked the JAL flight for my son using 37,500 Alaska miles + $57.40 in taxes. I booked his friend on the same flight by using 25,750 BA Avios + $311 in taxes. Total: 114,750 miles + $832.80 in taxes and fees for two tickets. Difference: The new cost is -28,000 fewer miles but +$576.30 in taxes and cancellation fees.
Is it a bummer that I couldn’t book them in Premium Economy? Sure. But, these boys are young, and they can handle the long hours in regular economy. They will have their own row of two seats by the window. JAL Sky Wider seats are almost 18 inches wide with 33 inches of pitch.
Other Considerations
I still need to buy positioning flights from DFW to/from SFO. I plan to use miles and points for those flights.
Then, I need to figure out lodging. In Kyoto, I booked a machiya (traditional Japanese wooden house) that already has space for our 6th traveler. I’m still deciding on lodging in Tokyo.
Are we crazy to add another traveler to this trip? Hopefully not!
Author: Nancy
Nancy lives near Dallas, Texas, with her husband and three kids. Her favorite vacations include the beach, cruising and everything Disney.
Is this for a summer trip?
Yes, early summer
@Pam When my niece traveled with us two years ago, She was 23 and had her own credit card. That made things easy because she could simply put her stuff on her own card. I’ll need to check and make sure my son’s friend has a credit or debit card.
Math gets a little fuzzy when I’m doing any grocery shopping for the group (like with a timeshare or hotel unit with kitchen) or my husband is picking up the tab for bfast/lunch/dinner when we dine as a group, which is most of the time.. Seems a little petty to ask the child to pony up at that point. Or when I book an activity, I do so as a group (and then on my credit card) to get the right seating, availability, etc Since you are evenly dividing those costs out with your group, how are you managing that?
I’ve always been generous with points & miles – the issue I usually then have with the +1s are showing up without much funding for some food/activities on top of! Kids we invite seem to take $ their parents may share to help out with costs then save instead for some souvenir they really want, etc. Sometimes even adult couples push the line after I have “paid” for airfare/hotel with my stash. I don’t want to seem selfish or rude by pointing these behaviors out, but I also didn’t take any of them to raise & enough gets to be enough. I expect to host them & pay for some expenses but a little reciprocity is also appreciated. Hoping your experiences play out more favorably.
@Pam That does sound frustrating! With my niece on the past trip and this friend on next year’s trip, we covered flights and lodging and they pay for food/activities/souvenirs.
I think a lot of us have been in a similar situation. For me, the key is to clearly explain the ground rules in advance to avoid miscommunication. People being people it’s still not a perfect system but it works fairly well.
So very generous of you! I’m sure it’ll be even more of a blast for your son. I would love to be able to do the same but just don’t have enough points to add more people (fam of 4 already). An updated post on your point/miles earning strategy would be greatly appreciated! Both husband and I churn cards for points but it never seems like enough when we gotta pay for 4.
@Chelsea I understand. It’s hard to stretch points when you travel as a family of 4-5 people. I can definitely write a post on how we got the miles for this trip and my strategy go-forward.
I just wanted to mention that it’s so generous of you to use points on your friend’s son. I’m sure he will be very grateful. And yes, two 20-year olds can most definitely survive in coach for 11 hours.
@Leana An added benefit of bringing his friend is that I believe he will encourage my son to get out there and see everything every day instead of a taking day off to “chill” in the hotel like he does on most trips.
It should be a good experience for your son to partially travel with friend on his own, and partially rely on your planning. That can give him a taste of travel self-reliance.
@Aleks Yes, I think they will enjoy flying on their own. Adventure awaits!